So this has been a very hard week. First it was hard because the girls wanted Pizza on Monday and I caved and ate 3 pieces, bread and all. I have been trying to get rid of that all week long. The inflammation/water weight just stuck with me. Then, Thursday morning, my Momma had to be taken to the ER and was later admitted to the hospital. I went over right after school on Thursday and stayed until 10:00, and then I went over at 7:00 Friday night and stayed until they released her at 6:00 Sunday night. It's very hard to stay on plan when your only food options include a hospital cafeteria, a sweet shop, and a Wendy's, but I thought I was doing very well. I typically had bacon and scrambled eggs for breakfast and a ranch salad with grilled chicken from the salad bar, and either a small chili or a bunless burger for dinner.. Unfortunately when I weighed in Monday morning, I saw that the week, along with all the commercially prepared meals of the weekend, had definitely taken its toll on me. I wanted to cry when I looked at the numbers on the scale and saw a gain instead of a loss. This is the first time in many, many weeks that I have seen a gain.
However, the more I thought about it, I realized that all that the number on the scale tells me is my gravitational relationship to the earth. It does not define me, and it can not tell me everything there is to know about my overall health and success. Here's some proof of that. To the right are two pictures of me. The one on the left was taken on Mother's day, 2014. The one on the right was taken a week or so ago; they are just a little more than one year apart. I barely recognize the woman on the left. Thankfully, I don't know who she is anymore. This is a much better measurement of my overall health and success than some numbers on a scale after a horrendously stressful and tough week.
Here's another non scale indicator of my overall health and success. The picture to the left was taken on Monday, which was Memorial Day. I was preparing to go with Chris to visit my inlaws, and in the name of comfort, I chose to wear a tank top that I recently bought (It's a XXL! So glad to get out of the XXXL range). I can tell you exactly when the last time I wore a tank top out in public, much less a form fitting one like this one, was. Yes, it was NEVER. I have never had the self confidence to wear something like this out in public. I've always thought my arms and face were too fat to wear tank tops, but look at me now! I felt perfectly comfortable in this, and the added bonus was that I didn't burn up because it was hot that day.
As I mentioned in a previous post, my reward to myself for losing 50 lbs is my first tattoo. I met with my artist earlier in the week and have a 4 hour session booked for June 4th. I realize that the 2 lb gain I suffered this week may prevent me from being 50 lbs down by that time. I still have 4.4 lbs to go until I reach that first big goal, and I just don't know if I can do that in a week. I felt a bit like a fraud at first, keeping my appointment. However, I've come to realize that those 4.4 lbs don't define me. I will lose them, whether this week or next, and even if I don't lose them before June 4th, I still deserve to be rewarded for all of my hard work thus far.
As I mentioned in a previous post, my reward to myself for losing 50 lbs is my first tattoo. I met with my artist earlier in the week and have a 4 hour session booked for June 4th. I realize that the 2 lb gain I suffered this week may prevent me from being 50 lbs down by that time. I still have 4.4 lbs to go until I reach that first big goal, and I just don't know if I can do that in a week. I felt a bit like a fraud at first, keeping my appointment. However, I've come to realize that those 4.4 lbs don't define me. I will lose them, whether this week or next, and even if I don't lose them before June 4th, I still deserve to be rewarded for all of my hard work thus far.
My final piece of proof that the number on the scale is not the be all end all of my health and success is that I also took my measurements this week. With everything going on with my mom, I didn't have time for new progress photos, but those will come next week. Below are my current stats:
Week 12 - 282.6 lbs (+2 lbs, -45.8 lbs total)
Total Inches Lost: 44
BMI reduction: 6.9
Week 12 - 282.6 lbs (+2 lbs, -45.8 lbs total)
Total Inches Lost: 44
BMI reduction: 6.9
Weight: Height: BMI: Neck: Bust: Band: Waist: Hips: Arm (x2): Thigh (x2): Calf (x2): | 10-13-14 328.4 5'8" 49.9 16.5 54.5 47 49.5 60 21.5 33.75 21.25 | 4-19-15 293.4 5'8" 44.6 15 50.25 43 44 56 19.75 31.5 20 | 5-22-15 282.6 5'8" 43 15 50 42 42.25 54.25 18 30.75 19.75 |